Where Have All The Shower Caps Gone?

I’m a woman. There’s about a fifty-fifty shot that you’re a woman too. So, can someone answer this question: why don’t women wear shower caps anymore? I couldn’t for the life of me tell you where to even purchase one of these latex skull caps, much less the last time I shoved my hair inside one.

Now, granted, I haven’t really looked in the last, oh say twenty five years, but still, I haven’t even noticed them in passing. I would presume they’d be in the hair care aisle, hanging somewhere near the increasingly hard-to-find shampoo for normal hair. Not for color treated, or frosted, or highlighted, or streaked or even straightened…just plain ol’ normal hair!

Now I’m really not one for conspiracy theories, but was there some sort of subliminal campaign back in the 80’s, perpetrated by the greedy and powerful shampoo industry, that convinced us that unwashed hair was like un-brushed teeth or un-rolled-on armpits? Were shower caps seriously cutting into their business? Might there be a new George Clooney-Ben Affleck docudrama in our future?

And while we’re on the subject, what about swim caps? Of course I still see them on competitive swimmers…those crazed athletes who shave every hair off their bodies in the hopes of likewise shaving a millisecond off their time…but what about the rest of us? I certainly don’t like my hair turning green or drying out from chlorine or clogging up pool drains like my grandmother would tell me each and every time she squeezed my average sized head into the doll-sized, daisy-decorated swim cap she purchased at the local five and dime. 

I’m not entirely sure the blood has ever fully returned to my brain...as one can tell from my writings!